Wednesday, August 4, 2010

Happy Birthday to my craziest niece, Melissa!!

August 6th - A day that will live in infamy!! On that day in 1945, the U.S. dropped a bomb on Hiroshima, Japan. Life there was never the same ....on that day in 1973, Sherry and John dropped a bomb on Ft. Worth in the form of Melissa Lynne Bryant and life as we knew it was never the same!! Famous people born on August 6th are Actor Robert Mitchum, Poet Alfred Lord Tennyson and Actress Lucille Ball of "I Love Lucy"...which do you think most fits our Melissa?!?!

What a mess! Her mom wrote in her baby book at an early age that she was "sneaky and evil"! Some things never change. I just witnessed about a month ago her putting a slimy frog down her sister's top while out on the dock. I don't know many girls that would even pick up a frog and I know none that would want it down their top!! This "free spirit" started at an early age. One hot summer day, the mailman rang the door bell and handed Sherry 3 baby kittens that he found in the mailbox. They were, of course, all sweaty and on death's door....Was she trying to mail them? Who will ever know! None died, I'm glad to report - just a little brain damaged...but aren't all cats a little crazy anyway?

Melissa was a cut-up at school and loved to entertain her classmates thus she was frequently in trouble; however, she was very likable so the teachers never really could get too mad! She had a way of making them laugh also. She talked a lot and was once relegated to sit at the table of very quiet kids in order to keep her quiet, figuring if none of them would talk to her, then she'd also not talk. After 10 minutes the whole table was acting up and laughing. So much for the teacher's best efforts! School was never high on Melissa's list - it was a social affair at best. She had no intentions of going to college, in fact, she never even took the SAT or ACT tests. Later in life when someone asked her where she went to school she replied, "Butler Elementary"!

Before she was "Mel" she was known as "Mo" - short for molasses!! Her Uncle Bill changed her name! Never was there a slower child! You had to literally hold her arms up to put them into the sleeves of her shirt - and she was 4 years old for Heaven's sake!!!...an age quite capable of doing such a simple task! She is still slow!!!! When we go shopping, we tell her we are leaving at 9:00 so she'll be ready by 10:30! I could go mow the entire yard, feed the dogs, paint the house, cook breakfast, take a shower, get dressed and be ready and she is still sitting in the bathroom with a towel wrapped around her wet head, putting on her make-up! This is the gospel truth - if I'm lying, I'm dying!! She stayed with us once and we went to the beach. I thought Bill was going to leave her on the side of the road in Galveston - Patience is not his finest virtue and neither is this beautiful shirt he has on here - and don't you love his capri pants!

Melissa loved her older sister, Robyn, and her cousins, Jenny, David and Jaime. They spent many holidays together and even put on a live nativity at Christmas time. She played the part of the "uninterested, lazy angel" as seen here holding onto the bushes to keep her wings spread out! Robyn was "Mary", Jaime was "Baby Jesus", David was "Joseph" and Jenny was....I don't know, but I'm sure it was an important part because she and Robyn always had the best parts! Melissa and David couldn't have cared less and Jaime was too little to voice her opinion. Mel liked being with all the cousins but none better than David...they are 9 months apart and equally "sneaky and evil". They always wanted to marry each other but Texas frowns on such things; besides, think of what their offsprings would have been like!? Heaven help us!

Her 2-week visit to Houston in the early 80's was an adventure of neighborhood terrorism. I cannot tell you all they did during those 2 weeks. One reason is because I don't know and don't want to know all they did, but also because they both might be put in jail - but let's just say they were not holding neighborhood Bible studies! It reminded me a little of "To Kill a Mockingbird" but I think they might have been doing more than knocking on the door of Boo Radley's ramshackled house!

One of their wildest escapades was taken out on the poor neighbors next door - the Divins! They had moved out and their unoccupied house made for a perfect Crime Lab. I honestly didn't know they were over there! One hot afternoon, I opened the back gate to see David, Mel and Jaime (the innocent) standing there white as a sheet and sweating profusely. Little did I know that while they were next door in their secret hiding place, the owners came home to find it - well, let's just say, not in the same shape they had left it in! The 3 terrorists hid in the far back corner of a walk-in closet, shaking in their boots, finally narrowly escaping through a window and into our backyard. It was some time later that I found out why they were so scared. The lady of the house had left her bottles of hair color in one room and they decided to "graffiti" the walls! They wrote "Party Blood" on the carpet and "Death to all" on the wall. We heard later, by the new owners, that every time they painted the walls in that room that "something keeps bleeding through"...Hmmm...wonder what that could be!? Their poor swimming pool had tons of leftover trash thrown into it - toilets, bowling balls, rakes, boards, pillows and even a hot water heater!! I don't know if these fine young people did this or not, as I was not there, but I'm just sayin'....... In 1973, the year sweet Melissa was born, the burglars who broke into the Democratic headquarters at Watergate were caught - They should have taken lessons from Mel and David....they were never caught!

Mel was not particularly interested in anything athletic. There were reasons probably! She once fell off of her moped and had 2nd and 3rd degree burns on her thighs. She was the basketball manager at Lamar High School and while mopping the floor, fell flat on her face in front of all the student body! She did ride horses and was pretty good at it until she broke 3 fingers - bathing the horse!! His name was Antar! It was one of those rent-a-horse things and I think this passion didn't last very long thus they didn't lose much hard-earned money on this short-lived hobby. She did love animals but showed poor judgement when she purchased an Akita named "Nikki".... the world's meanest dog! Melissa is shown here demonstrating her attitude! She now rests where all evil dogs rest - down below! It is the only dog I have ever been scared of! I think her parents were too closely related...all the more reason Mel and David didn't need to get married to each other!

The English language was always a challenge to Melissa and it still is. She could almost get phrases right which left most of us dying laughing. Did you know that JFK was shot on the "grassy mole" in Dallas? and OJ Simpson was "indicated" instead of indicted! If someone was really mad they got "up on their shoebox" to say something instead of their "soapbox"! When in Paris on a family trip, she was really confused when they visited Notre Dame. She asked, "well, where is it? Isn't it a football stadium?" Just lately she wanted to say something really badly so she said, "I want the table" instead of "the floor". She just went to Mexico with the family and she purposely took Riley's car seat so she could put it on the seat in the plane....one problem...she checked it in with the luggage and remembered it as it was going through the little shoot to the luggage below the plane. She was late to the airport, of course, and was in a hurry and perhaps was not thinking straight. I'll give her the benefit of the doubt here as she had 3 kids in tow plus all the baby junk and suitcases. She is constantly amusing the rest of us. This is the same girl that left her goggles on her forehead while getting a spray tan!

I wish we all had the same outlook on life that Melissa has. Every day is a gift from God and she chooses to smile through everything! She is a delight to be around; I, for one, love to be with her. She makes me laugh and she loves to laugh. She loves to entertain, throws great parties, buys great gifts, is a true friend, can find anything on the internet, loves her family and she can brighten any room. Her 3 babies, Reagan, Ethan and Riley, are the love of her life and she is the sweetest, most patient mommy I've ever seen. She has always landed on her feet and she will continue to do so. We love you, Mel and we are truly glad God gave you to us on August 6th, 1973 - a day we will always remember!!

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